Humor
Rats!
A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco’s Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display he discovers a detailed bronze sculpture of a rat. The sculpture is so interesting and unique that he picks it up and asks the shop owner the price. “Twelve dollars for the rat, sir,” says the shop […]
Baby Boomers’ Concerns
Then: Long hair Now: Longing for hair Then: A keg Now: A ekg Then: Acid rock Now: Acid reflux Then: Moving to California because it’s cool. Now: Moving to California because it’s hot. Then: Watching John Glenn’s historic flight with your parents Now: Watching John Glenn’s historic flight with your kids Then: Trying to look […]
Disapproving Bartender
A man is waiting for wife to give birth. The doctor comes in and informs the dad that his son was born without torso, arms or legs. The son is just a head! But the father loves his son and raises him as well as he can, with love and compassion. After 21 years, the […]
Children’s Prayers
One Sunday in a Midwest city a young child was “acting up” during the morning worship hour. The parents did their best to maintain some sense of order in the pew but were losing the battle. Finally the father picked the little fellow up and walked sternly up the aisle on his way out. Just […]
Clever Dog
A devout couple felt it important to own an equally devout pet. So, they went shopping. At a kennel specializing in this particular breed, they found a dog they liked. When they asked the dog to fetch the Bible, he did it in a flash. When they instructed him to look up Psalm 23, he […]
Christian Bear
A country preacher decided to skip services one Sunday and head to the hills to do some bear hunting. As he rounded the corner on a perilous twist in the trail, he and a bear collided, sending him and his rifle tumbling down the mountainside. Before he knew it, his rifle went one way and […]
Toilet Problems
These are real extracts from letters to the DHSS (in England: who are they?) Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces. Can you please tell me when our repairs are going to be done as my wife is about to become an expectant mother. The toilet is blocked and […]
What Does That Tell You Holmes?
Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson went on a camping trip. After a good mealand a bottle of wine they lay down for the night, and went to sleep.Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend. "Watson,look up at the sky and tell me what you see."Watson replied, "I see millions and millions of […]
Dear Pastor :-)
Letters to a pastor Dear Pastor, I know God loves everybody but He never met my sister. Yours sincerely, Arnold. Age 8, Nashville. Dear Pastor, Please say in your sermon that Peter Peterson has been a good boy all week. I am Peter Peterson. Sincerely, Pete. Age 9, Phoenix Dear Pastor, My father should be […]
The Bible In 50 Words
(sorta kinda) God made Adam bit Noah arked Abraham split Jacob fooled Joseph ruled Bush talked Moses balked Pharaoh plagued People walked Sea divided Tablets guided Promise landed Saul freaked David peeked Prophets warned Jesus born God walked Love talked Anger crucified Hope died Love rose Spirit flamed Word spread God remained
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