Humor
Euro-English
New Euro Language “Euro-English” European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan […]
New Hospital Wing
When a panel of doctors was asked to vote on adding a new wing to their hospital, the allergists voted to scratch it and the dermatologists advised no rash moves. The gastroenterologists had a gut feeling about it, but the neurologists thought the administration had a lot of nerve and the obstetricians stated they were […]
Pharmacist
A lady walks into a drug store and asks the pharmacist for some arsenic. The pharmacist asks, “Ma’am, what do you want with arsenic?” The lady says, “To kill my husband.” “I can’t sell you any for that reason.” says the pharmacist. The lady then reaches into her purse and pulls out a photo of […]
Riddles
(Answers are at the bottom of the page.) 1.. What goes up and down stairs without moving? 2.. Give it food and it will live; give it water and it will die. 3.. What can you catch but not throw? 4.. I run, yet I have no legs. What am I? 5.. Take one out […]
Making a Will
An enormously wealthy 65-year-old man falls in love with a young woman in her twenties and is contemplating a proposal. “Do you think she’d marry me if I tell her I’m 45?” he asked a friend. “Your chances are better,” said the friend, “if you tell her you’re 95.” . ========================== . The best way […]
Trip to the Zoo
Little Johnny wanted to go to the zoo and pestered his parents for days. Finally, his mother talked his reluctant father into taking him. “So how was it?” his mother asked when they returned home. “Great,” Little Johnny replied. “Did you and your father have a good time?” asked his mother. “Yeah, Daddy especially liked […]
Father’s occupation
“What’s your father’s occupation?” asked the teacher on the first day of the new academic year. “He’s a magician, Ma’am,” said the new boy. “How interesting. What’s his favorite trick?” “He saws people in half.” “Gosh! Now, next question. Any brothers or sisters?” “One half brother and two half sisters.” . ========================== . A gentleman […]
SO YOU THINK ENGLISH IS EASY?
SO YOU THINK ENGLISH IS EASY????? Read to the end . . . a new twist to an oldie Can you read these right the first time? 1) The bandage was wound around the wound. 2) The farm was used to produce produce. 3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more […]
Hair
A young boy had just gotten his driver’s permit and enquired of his father, if they could discuss his use of the car. His father said, “I’ll make a deal with you. You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little, get your hair cut and we’ll […]
Seniors
Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, “How old was your husband?” “98,” she replied. “Two years older than me.” “So you’re 96,” the undertaker commented. She responded, “Hardly worth going home, is it? Reporters interviewing a 104-year-old woman: “And what do you think is the […]
Categories
Articles may be reproduced in any medium, without applying for permission
(provided they are unedited, and retain the original author/copyright information - and a reference to this website :-)!
26,756 articles online.
Protected by Akismet, Digital Ninjas and an Ion Cannon. Really.
Blog with WordPress