Humor
Disenchanted Church-Goer’s Prayer
G’day God, if you exist, Hello, what’s your game? I can’t figure it out. Thy churchdom’s crumbling. Its will is dumped throughout the earth and has much leaven. Give us this day give some little inkling of a reason WHY we should believe. Forgive the churches their trespasses as they forget to help those they […]
Exercise
It is well documented that for every minute that you exercise, you add one minute to your life. This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $5000 per month. —————————————————————————— My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. Now she’s 97 […]
*Merchant Captain*
One of the world’s most famous merchant captains died, having long been admired by his crew and fellow officers. They remained puzzled, however, over a strange ritual he performed daily. While at sea he would lock himself in his cabin and open a small safe, take out an envelope with a note inside and read […]
Zen Buddhist Master
The Zen master steps up to the hot dog cart and says, “Make me one with everything.” The hot dog vendor fixes a hot dog and hands it to the Zen master, who pays with a $20 bill. The hot dog vendor puts the bill in the cash drawer and closes the drawer. “Where’s my […]
Just What You Needed For Sunday School
http://www.thereverend.com/brick_testament/
Smart (Cheeky?) Little Girl
One day a 6 year old girl was sitting in a classroom. The teacher was going to explain evolution to the children. The teacher asked a little boy: TEACHER: Tommy do you see the tree outside? TOMMY: Yes. TEACHER: Tommy, do you see the grass outside? TOMMY: Yes. TEACHER: Go outside and look up and […]
Voice Mail To Heaven?
Have you ever wondered what it would be like if God decided to install voice mail? Imagine praying and hearing this: Thank you for calling My Father’s House. Please select one of the following options: Press 1 for Requests Press 2 for Thanksgiving Press 3 for Complaints Press 4 for All Other Inquiries I am […]
Religious (Some Corny!) One-Liners
1. Give God what’s right — not what’s left. 2. Man’s way leads to a hopeless end — God’s way leads to an endless hope. 3. A lot of kneeling will keep you in good standing. 4. He who kneels before God can stand before anyone. 5. In the sentence of life, the devil may […]
B. C.
B. C. There was a rather old fashioned lady, who was planning a couple of weeks’ vacation in Lakes Entrance. She also was quite delicate and elegant with her language. She wrote a letter to a particular caravan park and asked for a reservation. She wanted to make sure the caravan park was fully equipped […]
As The Psalm Says
Timmy was a little five year old boy that his Mom loved very much and, being a worrier, she was concerned about him walking to school when he started Kindergarten. She walked him to school the couple of days but when he came home one day, he told his mother that he did not want […]
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